Column entry, “Christian Family Practice: Spiritual Disciplines,” by Pettigrew and Badzinski

Column: Let’s Talk Family: Conversations about Faith and Family Flourishing

Column entry: “Christian Family Practice: Spiritual Disciplines”

By Jonathan Pettigrew, PhD, Arizona State University; Diane Badzinski, PhD, Colorado Christian University

Column Description: Let’s Talk Family: Conversations about Faith and Family Flourishing is a monthly column offering a space to consider research-based, biblically-sound practices for family communication. We all have families. And we all experience messy family communication from time to time. Our column focuses on what works and doesn’t work for helping families be a little less messy and a lot more rewarding. Please join the conversation.

October 2024

Christian Family Practice: Spiritual Disciplines

Worship, prayer and Bible study—three spiritual disciples that we’ve covered the past three months—are all key aspects of how we commune with God. These practices are called spiritual disciplines because they are habits and practices that help us live in a vibrant connection with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. There are other spiritual disciplines, like fasting, confession, and solitude. Throughout the ages, these disciplines have supported Christian development and maturation. In this column, we provide resources to help us, and our families grow even closer to God through these disciplines.

Not all disciplines will come naturally to you, nor will they be easy. Perhaps that’s why they are called disciplines. As we discuss in our book Family Communication and the Christian Faith, disciplines are “training regimen designed to ‘put to death the misdeeds of the body’ (Rom. 8:13). This transformation occurs through the power of the Spirit of God at work in our own spirits, but it does not happen without our involvement.”

Our homes serve as the ideal setting for these training regimens. As Christians, we are called to make disciples and impart Christ’s teachings (Matt. 28:19-20). This responsibility is most profoundly expressed within our own households. It is here that we should actively practice spiritual disciplines and educate our children in them.

Why are spiritual disciplines important?

Knowing and connecting with our infinite, loving Creator is the goal of spiritual disciplines. There is not a single right or wrong way to practice spiritual disciplines. And some disciplines may never be possible. Diabetics, for example, may never fast, but that doesn’t mean they can’t connect with God. Bible study was nearly impossible for millions of believers when communists in China and behind the Iron Curtain banned God’s word, but even then God’s people had a deep hunger to know God through his word and prayed that God would send Bibles (for enthralling stories about these times, check out The Heavenly Man or God’s Smuggler). Christians throughout the centuries have found spiritual disciplines to bring balance to their lives and help move them toward mature, intimate, and deeper connection with God. So, it is helpful to avail ourselves of such wisdom and expand our repertoire for communion with our Lord.

Dallas Willard argues in his excellent book The Spirit of the Disciplines: Understanding How God Changes Lives that developing disciplined lives enables us to live out of the power of God’s Spirit daily. The goal of Spiritual disciplines, he suggests, is not the discipline itself but the fruit of the discipline. By habituating spiritual disciplines, we can “put to death the deeds of the flesh” (Rom. 8:13) and be conformed into the image of Christ (Rom. 8:29). We must “consciously and purposefully regard ourselves as ‘dead to sin and alive to God in union with Jesus Christ’ (Rom. 6:11, NEB). Through intentional practice, we train ourselves in right thinking and living. We develop habits and attitudes that produce righteousness. Like muscle memory comes from constant training, spiritual disciplines also train us in godliness.

What are examples of spiritual practices?

One of the best sources on the subject of spiritual disciplines is Richard Foster’s Celebration of Discipline: The Path to Spiritual Growth. Foster organizes 12 spiritual practices into three groups of inward, outward, and corporate disciplines. The inward disciplines include meditation, prayer, fasting, and study. Outward disciplines are simplicity, solitude, submission, and service. Finally, corporate disciplines include confession, worship, guidance, and celebration. For each discipline, Foster provides a definition of the practice, a biblical rationale for it, and then offers practical guidance on how to perform each discipline.

Let’s take fasting as an example. Fasting is a widely practiced discipline in Scripture and throughout church history, but if you’ve never fasted it may seem irrational or intimidating. Fasting can enhance self-discipline and also sharpen spiritual focus. It can strengthen our prayer life – not that it forces God to listen to us, but instead, it helps us to depend more entirely on God and devote our time and energy into our relationship with Him.

If we fast for more than a day or two, there are helpful steps to take to prepare our spirit, mind, and body. If you are a coffee drinker, for example, it may be wise to ween off caffeine over the week leading up to the fast, so you aren’t hit with a massive, distracting headache on the first day of the fast. Foster also shares what the experience of multi-day fasting is like physically and mentally, and how to break a fast in ways that are gentle on our body (hint: don’t eat a big steak or pork chop to break a week-long fast – you could get really sick, vomit, or worse – damage your digestive system).

Foster follows a similar pattern for each discipline, giving wise and experienced counsel for each practice. He shows that meditation, prayer, fasting, study, simplicity, solitude, submission, service, confession, worship, guidance, and celebration are just as relevant today as they were in ancient times for brothers and sisters in Christ.

Spiritual disciplines are for every Christian because connecting with God personally is quintessential to being a Christian. Christ frees us from sin, but he frees us to be “reconciled to God” (2 Cor. 5:20) – to know Him personally. This is why Paul’s impassioned prayer is to “know [Christ] and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death; if somehow I may attain to the resurrection from the dead” (Phil. 3:9-11).

So where to begin?

Set a realistic time period for training in a discipline. It might feel frustrating to try all the disciplines all at once. Maybe pick a discipline to develop over a month’s time and get Foster’s book and read about the discipline. Then set a plan to enact it. This is a life shift, of sort, so it will take time to cultivate this discipline.
Invite spiritual oversight and accountability. A trusted spiritual counselor, family member, or friend can give helpful tips, check in on your progress, support you through failures, and be an encouragement in triumphs. God designed us for relationship and for community. Connect with others as you seek to become transformed through the journey. Disciplines are something you can do with your family, not isolated from it (except probably solitude – that one is harder to do in a family, although it is possible!)
Adopt a mindset that you and your family can improve through practice. New habits are not formed overnight. Nor should you expect “perfect” practice the first time you try a spiritual discipline.
Remember the goal is connecting with God. As Donald Wittney says in the opening line of Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life, “Discipline without direction is drudgery.” The aim is not the discipline, but the result of the discipline – connection with your Heavenly Father.

As you practice, spiritual disciplines become habits which become a bedrock in your personal, spiritual journey. Like Brother Lawrence’s famous little book describes, you and your family can “practice the presence of God” and experience the joy of communion with God in all moments of your life.

Let us know how it goes.

Jonathan Pettigrew and Diane M. Badzinski

References

Brother Andrew (with John and Elizabeth Sherrill), God’s Smuggler, expanded edition (Chosen Books, 2015).

Brother Lawrence, The Practice of the Presence of God (Martino Fine Books, 2016, reprint of the 1895 edition).

Brother Yun (with Paul Hattaway). The Heavenly Man: The Remarkable True Story of Chinese Christian Brother Yun (Kregel Publications, 2020).

Richard J. Foster, Celebration of Discipline: The Path to Spiritual Growth, Special 20^th Anniversary Edition (Harper, 2000).

Jonathan Pettigrew and Diane M. Badzinski, Family Communication and the Christian Faith: An Introduction and Exploration (Pasco, WA: Integratio Press, 2023), 276-277.

Donald S. Whitney, Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life (Tyndale, 2014).

Dallas Willard, The Spirit of the Disciplines: Understanding How God Changes Lives (San Francisco: HarperOne, 1998).

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